Often times, God will break us down before He builds us up again. I believe it’s His way of getting rid of all the junk inside of us so that He has a clean canvas to work with. I’m reminded of the scripture about the refiner’s fire. Think about the process that a diamond must go through or a caterpillar before it becomes a butterfly. We too must go through some stuff before we can experience true happiness. Just my two cents!
I can’t believe it’s been 2 months and 2 days since my last post.
Much has happened.
I was reminded that born-again Christians go through the same grieving process that the rest of the world goes through. The 7 Stages of Grief are real and we all experience some or all of them. I definitely went through the Denial and Anger stages of grief after Bill Lupetti passed.
Thankfully, I was wise enough to ask for prayer because I was too angry to pray for myself! I’m living proof that prayer works because God did not hesitate to answer the prayers of those who prayed that I would quickly get over my anger. I must admit, being angry with God, whom I love more than life itself, it one of the absolute WORST feelings in the world. When I couldn’t take it anymore, I ask for prayer at a women’s prayer breakfast at church. God answered that prayer pretty quickly and I’m thankful because otherwise, the anger would have consumed me.
Why was I angry? For the same reasons anyone else would be angry when someone they care about passes away. Just because I’m saved and Bill was saved doesn’t spare either of us from experiencing the same emotions and feelings that any other human experiences. Yes, I know where Bill is and I know that he has received his crown of glory along with his new body and I know he is no longer in pain, but as selfish as it is…I still wanted Bill here for just a little while longer. I needed more time with him. I needed to tell him things that I never got a chance to say. It’s a sharp reminder to take hold of every opportunity that we have with those we love and care about because tomorrow is not promised to any of us.
I went to visit Bill’s grave on the one month anniversary of his passing. I didn’t do anything other than talk to him as if he were still here with me. I haven’t looked at any of the photos I took at Bill’s viewing or funeral…I’m just not ready yet. Perhaps on Monday for Memorial Day.
For anyone else who may be suffering the loss of a loved one or going through any other difficult situation, remember God is faithful and true to His word: never will I leave you, never will I forsake you.
God knows what we’re going through…each and every single one of us.